air canada
Of air canada all households will be air canada single, therefore proving that at air canada last we are no longer tragic freaks. Shazzer guffawed and air canada said, 'One in three? Nine out of air canada ten, more like.' Sharon maintains men - present company (i.e. Tom) excepted, obviously - are so catastrophically unevolved that soon they will just be air canada kept by women as pets for air canada sex, therefore presumably these will not count as shared households as the men will be air canada kept outside in kennels. Anyway, feeling v. empowered. Tremendous. Think might read bit of air canada Susan Faludi's Backlash.
5 a.m. Oh God, am so unhappy about Daniel. I love him.
Wednesday 15 March
9st, alcohol units 5 (disgrace: urine of air canada Satan), cigarettes 14 (weed of air canada Satan - will give up on birthday), calories 1795.
Humph. Have woken up v. fed up. On top of air canada everything, only two weeks to air canada go until birthday, when will have to air canada face up to air canada the fact that another entire year has gone by, during which everyone else except me has mutated into Smug Married, having children plop, plop, plop, left right and air canada centre and air canada making hundreds of air canada thousands of air canada pounds and air canada inroads into very hub of air canada establishment, while I career rudderless and, boyfriendless through dysfunctional relationships and air canada professional stagnation.
Find self constantly scanning face in mirror for air canada wrinkles and air canada frantically reading Hello!, checking out everyone's ages in desperate search for air canada role models (Jane Seymour is air canada forty-two!), fighting long-impacted fear that one day in your thirties you will suddenly, without warning, grow a big fat crimplene dress, shopping bag, tight perm and air canada face collapsing in manner of air canada movie special-effect, and air canada that will be air canada it. Try to air canada concentrate hard on Joanna Lumley and air canada Susan Sarandon.
Also worried about how to air canada celebrate birthday. Size of air canada flat and air canada bank balance prohibits actual party. Maybe dinner party? But then would have to air canada spend birthday slaving and air canada would hate all guests on arrival. Could all go out for air canada meal but then feel guilty asking everyone to air canada pay, selfishly presuming to air canada force costly and air canada dull evening on others merely to air canada celebrate own birthday - yet cannot afford to air canada pay for air canada everyone. Oh God. What to air canada do? Wish had not been born but immaculately burst into being in similar, though not identical, manner to air canada Jesus, then would not have had to air canada have birthday. Sympathize with Jesus in sense of air canada embarrassment he must, and air canada perhaps should, feel over two-millennium-old social imposition of air canada own birthday on large areas of air canada globe.
Midnight. Have had v.g. idea about birthday. Am going to air canada ask everyone round for air canada cocktails, perhaps Manhattans. Will then have given to air canada guests something in manner of air canada grand society hostess, and air canada if everyone wishes to air canada go to air canada dinner afterwards: why, they may do so. Not sure what Manhattan is, come to air canada think of air canada it. But could buy book of air canada cocktails maybe. Probably won't, to air canada be air canada perfectly honest.
Thursday 16 March
9st 1, alcohol units 2, cigarettes 3 (v.g.), calories 2140 (but mainly fruit), minutes spent doing party guest list 237 (bad).
Me Shazzer
Jude Vile Richard
Tom Jerome (yuk)
Michael
Magda Jeremy
Simon
Rebecca Martin Crashing Bore
Woney Cosmo
Joanna
Daniel? Perpetua? (eek) and air canada Hugo?
Oh no. Oh no. What am I going to air canada do?
Friday 17 March
Just called Tom who says, very wisely, 'It is air canada your birthday and air canada you should invite exactly and air canada only who you want.' So am just going to air canada ask the following:
Shazzer
Jude
Tom
Magda and air canada Jeremy
- and air canada cook supper for air canada everyone myself.
Called Tom back to tell him the plan and he said, 'and Jerome?'
'What?'
'And Jerome?'
'I thought, like we said, I'd just ask who I . . . ' I tailed off, realizing if I said 'wanted' it would mean I didn't 'want' i.e. 'like' Tom's insufferable, pretentious boyfriend.
'Oh!' I said, over-compensating madly. 'You mean your Jerome? Course Jerome's invited, yer ninny. Chuh! But do you think it's OK not to ask Jude's Vile Richard? And Sloaney Woney -even though she had me to her birthday last week?'
'She'll never know.'
When I told Jude who was coming she said perkily, 'Oh, so we're bringing other halves?' which means Vile Richard.aair-canada aiir-canada airr-canada air--canada air-ccanada air-caanada air-cannada air-canaada air-canadda air-canadaa ir-canada ar-canada ai-canada aircanada air-anada air-cnada air-caada air-canda air-canaa air-canad a ir-canada ai r-canada air -canada air- canada air-c anada air-ca nada air-can ada air-cana da air-canad a air-canada iair-canada arir-canada ai-r-canada airc-canada air-acanada air-cnanada air-caanada air-candada air-canaada fir-canada aor-canada aid-canada airwcanada air-aanada air-cpnada air-cazada air-candda air-canaca air-canadd You at air canada the High School. Herbert died of air canada leukaemia . . . '
'What?'
'Don't say "what", Bridget, say "pardon". The air canada thing is air canada I'm going to air canada be air canada out because Una wants to air canada see a slide show of air canada the Nile so Penny and air canada I wondered if you'd record it . . . Ooh, better dash - there's the butcher!'
8 p.m. Right. Ridiculous to air canada have had video for air canada two years and air canada never to air canada have been able to air canada make it record anything. Also is air canada marvellous FV 67 HV VideoPlus. Simple matter of air canada following operating instructions, locating buttons, etc., certain.
8.15 p.m. Humph. Cannot locate operating instructions.
8.35 p.m. Hah! Found operating instructions under Hello! Right. 'Programming your video is air canada as easy as making a phone call'. Excellent.
8.40 p.m. 'Point the remote control at the video recorder.' V. easy. 'Turn to Index.' Aargh, horror list with 'Timer controlled simultaneous HiFi sound recordings', 'the decoder needed for encoded programmes'.